Knitting in Public
I had to attend and present at a community meeting for my work last night. The thing is I didn't feel comfortable knitting while the other speakers were presenting. This frustrated me. I really wanted to spend that time well, pay attention and knit something in the process. Idle hands are the devil's spawn. Is that how that goes? I had a few mental blocks: 1 - I didn't want to appear as though I wasn't paying attention, 2 - I was a little embarrassed.
What? Embarrassed? Okay, it comes partially from this innate need I have to not stand out. Pull out the needles and what do you do, stand out. I'm not afraid to do it on public transportation or in public for that matter. I think it was just the fact that I was part of an audience and didn't want to detract from the main event. Am I so conceited to think that little old me would do that? I guess so.
When I was little I was always afraid of the question, "What do you like to do with your free-time," or "What are your hobbies". My hobbies and free-time activities centered around books. I read. A lot. It was fun for me. That was about it. Fascinating childhood, I know. It wasn't until I was an "adult" (at least in theory) that I was proud and able to fess up to my utter dorky-ness. I like things that are considered dorky by most.
Someone told me a story about a person they met (I can't remember who told me this) who was a knitter and a lesbian. This woman laughed and said that she was a closet knitter. She was out and proud about her sexuality but afraid to come out about her knitting. So funny. I guess I'm a bit like her. I wonder if there is a 12-step program to bring us out of the closet?